Losing a Member of the Family: Decisions after a Pet's Death

kkedrovsky - Michelle Thompson / PetSmart Charities
April 9, 2009

The loss of a pet is devastating in a Pet Parent’s life. Decisions about what to do next can be overwhelming. Although not an easy topic, it is better to create a plan for your pet’s death than to make hurried choices after the loss. Understanding what options are available for you can help you during a difficult time. According to the after-care experts at PALS (Pet & Animal Lovers Service, Inc.) located in Arizona, many Pet Parents do not know what choices they may have after their pet dies and do not know how or what to ask. When selecting your pet’s final resting place, it is important to make a choice that will fit your lifestyle and help you honor and remember your pet. The following are some of the options that may be available to you: Cemetery Burial Almost every state has a cemetery dedicated to caring for your pet’s remains. Pet cemeteries offer a wide range of services to fit your needs as well as performing the duties of both a funeral home and a cemetery. Although this may be more expensive, it ensures security for your pet’s final resting place. This may be a good option for renters or people who move frequently. Cremation There are two options available for Pet Parents who choose cremation. With a group/communal cremation, several deceased pets are cremated together. This is a more economical option and can be easier for some people to accept, according to PALS. However, remains will not be returned. The second option is an individual cremation, in which your pet is kept separate from others and the “cremains” are returned to you. These can be kept in a small urn or they can be buried or scattered in a place that was special to your pet, depending on local government regulations. Some crematories may also offer a chance to cremate your pet with a favorite sweater or other personal item, which can be very meaningful. Cremation is often more practical for Pet Parents who may not have the space for a private burial or do not want to use the services of a pet cemetery. “When you make a decision about what to do when your pet dies, you need to consider your commitment to your pet’s remains,” cautions Kemba Marshall, technical services veterinarian with PetSmart. “Consider where you will keep your pet’s ashes and how you want them to be a part of your life.” Home Burial Because of local regulations, you will need to check with your city or county government before burying your pet at home. You must be able to provide a proper burial – a site that will not be disturbed and a grave that is deep enough. Home burial allows you to create a memorial of your choice for your pet to honor the time you spent together. “In select situations, your veterinarian may even offer a home euthanasia service,” Marshall says. “But this is only a good choice if you plan to bury at home.” According to PALS, it is important to acknowledge the grief that comes with the loss of a pet. “The pain over the loss of a beloved companion animal is as natural as the pain we would feel over the loss of any significant relationship,” says Katherine Heuerman, founder of PALS. You can find information online or through a pet loss support hotline on how to help your children and other pets in your household deal with the loss. Some clinics and humane societies might also accept your pet’s supplies (clean food dishes, leashes, etc.) as a donation. It might help you to know that the supplies are still going to good use. Dr. Marshall recommends that Pet Parents allow themselves time to grieve. “You can talk to a trained professional who understands what you’re going through,” she says. “There are support groups for parents of all animals, even non-traditional pets.” Making a donation in memory of your pet can also help during the grieving process. Local animal welfare agencies or PetSmart Charities® are both options, and if your pet died of a particular disease, you may want to contribute to an organization searching for a cure. Your veterinarian may also make a donation to an animal charity in your pet’s name. Knowing that you are helping other animals can help with closure. Whatever choice you do make, resources exist to ensure that the organization is legitimate. The Better Business Bureau can provide business information about pet crematories and cemeteries, and you can review standards set by the International Association of Pet Cemeteries by calling 1-800-952-5541 or visiting www.iaopc.com. Many veterinary clinics and humane societies also operate pet cemeteries and crematories, and sites such as OurPals.com (the PALS online resource) have information on support groups, grieving, and the choices you will have for your pet.

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